The identity in the relationship between me and the other

The identity in the relationship between me and the other

Who am I? What is my role? What do I think about the idea that the others have about me?

The theme of the identity characterizes our daily path in an alternation of questions and uncertain answers. When we finally think we have understood who we are, a doubt brings us back to the indeterminacy of our limits.

There is no sure definition that describes us in a full and exhaustive way. This happens simply because we are “becoming beings”, subject to the multiplicity and variety of events that changes, like our body.

The mirror, in which our image is reflected, is the enormous witness of our non-fixity. The change of our face, the appearance of wrinkles and the signs of the flow of time seem to remind us constantly that we are “fluent”.

However, it is important to emphasize the positive aspect of this kind of fluidity. We could interpret it as the ability to adapt to what surrounds us.

The presence of the other influences us. The other becomes a mirror, unique and personal, capable of realizing an image of us often different from the one we attribute to ourselves. Everyone in fact develops a personal idea of the other.

So who are we? Are we in the way the others think about our person?

The philosopher Sartre doesn’t offer any definitive answer to this question: “Our human reality requires to be simultaneously for themselves and for others” (cit. From “The Essence and the Nothing”) showing the drama of this unsolvable dichotomy.

We persist in a state of doubt on our personal identity without apparent possibility of solution. Perhaps, however, the insolubility of this dilemma could be our salvation to a staticity that could take to annihilation.

For curiosity, I would recommend:

“L’essere e il Nulla” of Jean – Paul Sartre

“Uno, Nessuno e Centomila” of Luigi Pirandello

Maria Domenica Depalo



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