english articles

Yes or No

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Yes or No: two adverbs easy to write but not to pronounce. It could be a paradox but if we put the attention on the way we relate with the others, we could have a confirm of this contradiction.

Many can’t say “No”, says Paulo Coelho, while pronouncing “yes” seems easier. Often because of love, friendship or fear (but the reasons could be numerous else), when we are in front of questions, choices or existential crossroads, we answer with false enthusiasm and aggrement.

Are we really convinced of the answer? Does it correspond to what we want? Does the choice represent our ideas and thoughts? Are our aspirations and purposes fully embraced by that yes or no?

“Who never says “No” thinks to be generous, compassionate and educated: because “no” corresponds to be damned, selfish and little spiritual. […] There are times when, in saying “yes” to others, it may be that at the same time we are saying “no” to ourselves. ”

But when we say no, we smother our personality and don’t permit to ourselves and our potential to manifest.

Do you think that renouncing to yourself in this way is right?

Maria Domenica Depalo

P. S. The translated sentences are taken from “Manuale del guerriero della luce” of Paulo Coelho, ed. Bompiani

Sì o No

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Sì e No: due avverbi monosillabici e di semplice scrittura ma, spesso e volentieri, di difficile pronuncia. Ricchi di significato, tali parole si propongono come specchio e riflesso di ciò che siamo e di come ci rapportiamo al prossimo.

Molti hanno difficoltà a pronunciare “No”. (cit.), afferma Paulo Coelho (ed ha ragione) mentre pronunciare “Sì” sembra decisamente più semplice.

Spesso infatti per amore, per timore o per quieto vivere, dinanzi a bivi, domande importanti o anche scelte apparentemente banali rispondiamo annuendo con poco entusiasmo.

Ma siamo davvero convinti di quella risposta? È davvero ciò che vogliamo? Rappresenta appieno le nostre convinzioni ed idee? I nostri propositi e le nostre aspirazioni abbracciano quella parola in toto?

L’apertura e il senso di inclusione che il sì ed il no comprendono, vengono sempre espressi con consapevolezza piena?

“Chi non dice mai di “no”, si crede generoso, comprensivo, educato: perché il “no” porta con sé la nomea di maledetto, egoista, poco spirituale. […] Ci sono momenti in cui, nel dire “sì” agli altri, potrebbe darsi che, contemporaneamente, si stia dicendo “no” a se stesso”. (cit.)

Ma dicendo no a noi stessi, soffochiamo la nostra personalità non permettendo al nostro io e alle nostre potenzialità di manifestarsi appieno.

Vale davvero la pena assecondare l’altro rinunciando a se stessi?

Maria Domenica Depalo

P. S. Le citazioni sono tratte da “Manuale del guerriero della luce” di Paulo Coelho, ed. Bompiani

Aut – Aut (English version)

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Aut – Aut

Good and evil, joy and sadness, light and darkness, yin and yang and so on: we are surrounded by dualisms and dichotomies. However these oppositions and contrasts are only the final moment of a series of actions called choices.

Simple, difficult, complex or painful: the choices characterize and determine us. But how do they affect us? Are they so necessary?

In 1843 the Danish philosopher Sören Kierkegaard wrote a work entitled “Aut – Aut”. Aut is an adverse latin conjunction and it means either. The title translation therefore corresponds to “Or this or that”.

In particular, Kierkegaard emphasizes the dramatic vacuity of an “aesthetic” life dedicated to the ephemeral pleasure of the present moment. What should we do? Should we persevere with this kind of life of nothingness or opt for an “ethical” life, morally more acceptable and directed to the future but looking back to the past?

We have a variety of options and possibilities that can be fascinating and intriguing but also highly destabilizing.

“What do you choose? You choose yourself, not in your own immediacy, not as this casual individual, but you choose yourself in the eternal value […] “. (cit. Aut-Aut, ed. Mondadori, pp. 90-92)

The act of choosing is therefore fundamental as a moment of “reconquest” one’s own self. When you choose, you choose yourself in an active way and not passively. The multiplicity of options we can come across always have to be seen as an opportunity.

Choices may be right or wrong, but they will always be a manifestation of what we are and can not ignore.

For curiosity:

“Aut-Aut” by Sören Kierkegaard, Mondadori

“Filosofia” by Sergio Moravia, 3rd volume, ed. Le Monnier

Maria Domenica Depalo